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Related article: Date : Fri, January 4, 2008 14 17 -0500 43rd From: ronyx u003cronyx Woh. rr. com u003e Subject: fragile as a bird Chapter 5 The following is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to someone simply at random. The story is intended for mature audiences. May be obscenities and references to gay sex. If this offends you, please leave and find something better to read. The author retains all rights a history. Do not copy or use without written permission. Write to Ron ronyx Woh. rr. com with your comments. Preteen Nudist fragile as a bird Chapter 5 God. The water is warm. I dropped my wet clothes. My body wants to fight with , but I can not lift my arms. I close my eyes and I to drift. I am Preteen Nudist very hot. I can not explain the feeling of total euphoria. It's as if I had 'm preparing for my whole life. Funny how we lie to the night and what we die. It 101 by natural causes? Will the cancer at 67? Is there a car accident at 38 ora heart attack at 50? It may be a lot of fun. I read in the newspaper about is a peasant who came from a family of farmers in 62 accidents. His jacket sleeves have caught in the fan belt of a tractor and left him to die strangulation. And then there was the runner who was in the year the morning and got to know a driver. She was only 32. I am often asked if people woke up in the morning and had a premonition that are going to die that day. Did you know you going to happen? If the driver lost control of his car n and ran head-on into a bridge pillar of any idea that only a few seconds before the accident, was going to happen ? God should have said at the last minute ", is Psst. Your time has passed. " I didn ` t know the time, I in this fateful n decision. I had no idea before, I would not be there to see tomorrow the sun s to come. I had sealed my fate. No cancer, no car and not a tractor accident. to keep my mouth TighTLY, but my gut tells me breathe the air. But I know I can not. I can not open your mouth. No air ! However, I can not believe I have to take a gasp. Then the water. numbers. Suddenly I Preteen Nudist remember the numbers. Fucking figures. eighteen is important. I wanted to see eighteen. That was my day of liberation, but though my father is out of the house. Only four months. now. Six. June Sixth. The day I was almost finished. Although the school does not mean a lot to me was a day I was waiting for us. It turned out that Joey Carpenter, fuck miserable I am, I 've accomplished something. And now. And the funny number 35 My age is 35 I to accomplish something when I was your age. I wanted to prove that I have something better than the devil miserable. and now. do not want to die! That was not what I would end is too late. The water that surrounds the lungs. I can not breathe. 18th 35th 18th Sixth Sixth 35th numbers shit. ^ A6 18th. ^ A ^ A ^ A 35th ^ A18. ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A. 6 ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A ^ A 35th **************** \\ \\ n " Doctor" someone shouted. " I think we will lose. " There is a movement around me. I feel that the people pushing and shoving my ​​body. Someone raised an eyelid, and for a moment, I can see the light and misty figure above. Another person is something that in my mouth, and I , a tightness in my chest.. Where the hell am I? Why is my body does not move ? It feels like my spirit one place and my body is elsewhere. people still do not move me. And the bright light of my eyes. trying to scream and tell them to turn off the light, but my mouth can not open. Why are crying and looking so worried? God! I'm dying ! I survived the water, and now I'm in an emergency room to die in the hospital. God is cruel. He has made me live long enough to experience. " Stand back ! " Damn it. What the hell was that? It felt like a pink ray all over my body. " Stand back ! " shit! will hapPÉNED again. What is happening ? " He's going to go back! " ******************* " Good morning, young man. " the older sister was looking down on the side of my s with a smile of grandmother. "How you feeling today? " I turn my head. It is about four hours since I came back consciousness. Since then I have pushed, pressed, and subjected to extensive questioning. " Why skip" " Why have they tried to kill you ? " " Why would anyone want to die at your age? " n questions and answers. Fucking questions. One good thing about the bed in a hospital, no one expected the n to speak. And I do not think so. I turn my head when someone comes and begin their endless questions, stupid. "Why did you kill ?" Disk Read my shit, dumb Shit. I have 17 years, I'm gay, I was molested by an uncle, the mother of my s my father hates me, I lived in a garage and I have not that now. I have absolutely no future in front of me. Why the hell do you think , I wanted to die ? Searchto die. How ironic is this? I wanted to die. Past tense. it was something I never before, and I doubt they ever taking her. But just for this damn minutes, took a hasty decision that affect me forever. Forever. I think if I got it, there would be no future, only have a past. Do you think a weird things when only one time through then it is something like happened to me. For some reason, I tried to imagine As my obituary would read. N Aaron Joseph Carpenter, 17. Fucking city, cock sucker and marginalized South Western High School. Joey will be remembered for sexual abused by an uncle at the age of 11 and then physically and of an alcoholic father and mentally ill until the day I took a flight jump from the bridge at Washington Street. Will be remembered for a bitch no. Due to lack of interest, a memorial service has been canceled. almost guess it does not, right? However, we still don?t understand my last-minute repentance. Why I do not want to die ? I know that s had to live, not much, but then I did not want to end it. is that my obituary to say that doing something - nothing is accomplished. that If I have a prominent brain surgeon or a plumber left s every day and did what he had to do. While success was something. I would say that someone loves me, and that someone is to get into their hearts. I read somewhere that if a person you have in your thoughts after his death, then you will live forever. This is what I want. I remember the guy who is talking to our psychology class came last year. was 42 years old, and he said he had tried to commit suicide if was in school. She said her life was collapsing out of control. his varieties do not, and has been through a breakup with the girlfriend of a s go. He said he took a gun and tried to blow his brains out. I thought it was going to vomit when he takes a great picturer showed, the bathroom walls splattered with blood. I stared at the scars on the side of his face. Shit. In addition, surgery , plastic does not completely hide holes in her jaw. that joked that after seven facial surgery, doctors had returned to it looks good. We laughed nervously, but when his appearance, was not very fun. In spite of what had happened, he admitted he was pleased no. Tears appeared in his eyes as he spoke of his life. after stay in the hospital, returned to school and studied at the Faculty of Law. that became a lawyer, and after four years, was a prosecutor. that s met his wife, and had three beautiful children. Even left the photos to see for ourselves. He collapsed when he said that if he died today, would be lost in the wonderful life he has lived now. I think everyone in the room has been moved by his story. I I was white. I think I wanted. I was glad that I haveDn'T success. I had no devils n a lot to live, but I think it was funny. One day, my personal the hell was over. Had to be. The odds are in my favor, right? In addition, the ends worst storm, right? was that days later I realized that an off-duty police learned officer who drove over the bridge on the way home from a double move. After I jumped, stopped his car, threw his shoes n and followed me into the water. I resisted at first, but passed out before as he pulled my limp body to shore. He could find no pulse, performed CPR on me until paramedics arrived. Once in the emergency room, again suffered a cardiac arrest. doctors said he was dying and I had been given electric shocks. that explain the feelings I've found. Looking back, I 'm glad he was there. I hope I feel tomorrow. ************* Mrs. Fulton was patiently sitting in the chair and waits for me to say, something. We had been at a standstill on Fifteenin minutes. In addition, the ubiquitous question. " Why did you do that, " Everyone else had left ask, knowing he could not answer, but Mrs. Fulton. it Preteen Nudist was intended s, I would respond, one way or another. ", then fine. " She rose from her chair and lifted her dress. " When we met, I told you could do it the hard way or my way. I think that You chose the hard way. " I had my eyes closed and head turned to the side. I could hear, walk out the door. "After leaving the hospital, You will be sent to a juvenile prison and locked up until you run eighteen years of age. You have broken my trust in you. " His words were hard and cold. It was true. She had saved, and that he let them down. He had it all down. And above all, I had left down. Tears began streaming down my face when I heard the door open. " because he had nothing to live! " I screamed my lungs. " Are you happy? I had nothing to live. "I buried my head in my hands and wept. I could not control my emotions. Six years was raped flows upward, and took me immense pain. I began to Shake, and cried like a wounded animal. felt the rail of the bed, and Mrs. Fulton sat down and pulled me in it. "" Shhh, said to comfort her. "It's going to be okay. " " No, no! "Lamented that again. I looked and saw tears in the his eyes. " No, it will not. "I said emphatically. " Nothing has o me. "I started to mourn again. She held me tight, from time to time something encouraging whispers in my ear. nurse grabbed the bell, and a minute later, the older sister and one man assumed by a physician, registered. Mrs. Fulton came and calmly spoke to the doctor. He went and came a few minutes later, and gave me a shot in the right arm. Seconds later, I was fast asleep. ************* " Hey, motherfucker ! "Ticker was breaking into my room with a bunch of flowers wHat appeared to be a few weeds. "Here," he said, getting into my hands. "I have for you. " N " fucking stupid", I laughed. "Half of them are not even flowers. " " What I know " he smiled. "I've heard from the neighbors down the street ". I had forgotten how much it meant big red head in front of me for me. Her smile was contagious. I had not laughed for days, and suddenly no could not stop smiling. " You look good today," he said. " always look good," he said, rubbing the side of my face. "Whatever," he said sarcastically. He got up and sat down to watch and smiled. "What? " I asked. " You are now officially me, motherfucker. " He sat down to watch and smile. "What the hell are you talking about? " " Mrs. Fulton gave me," he laughed. N " You are my bitch now. " "Fuck you", I laughed. " What are you talking about? " I said n Scores, and Mrs. Fulton and her father she had called the office to their s and explained the situation. You had to find meAt home in continue to be, or would be placed in a juvenile facility until he eighteen years, they are about four months. After listening to my Options agreement, Mr. Wendelmeirer, let me stay in his apartment, at least time. "I can not do that," I said excitedly. "You 're family is too large take me in" n "My dad really do not care," he said ticker. No. "He just says, is to feed a other mouth. " "You eat enough for three people, " I laughed. "What I can say," he said, rubbing his belly enormous fun, "I am a growing boy. " N "I think we forget that at some point you really stop n to grow. " ticker walked over and stuck his head under his arm, and begun, Noogie me one. "Shut up, asshole " I cried. Suddenly the door opened and a nurse with the medication. " I'm afraid visiting hours are over. " I looked at the clock and it was a nine. He had lost track Preteen Nudist of time in the hospital. Days and the nights were confusing, especially if doctors kept me sedatives and sleeping pills. Later I learned that I see in the suicide n , and that was the reason for the constant attacks. I woke up the next morning with my mind still foggy from the pills, I is given. For someone who liked to be high, I did not know how feel of the drugs they were giving me. Weeds that makes you feel euphoric. sedation I had zonked me. I had trouble remembering things, and I could not control the time of day. a lunch, I wanted the dinner, breakfast and dinner than I expected. I have not even feel anything. When I try to remember the events of the in the last days was completely affected by the impact it had on me. choke point, it seemed like a movie on TV what Preteen Nudist happens n anyone. I even tried for a while to remember how it was when beaten by my father, but I gave up after I realized that I could not understand. Again it seemed that something that someone who spent else, not me. I slept a little, perhaps sometime in the afternoon. I really do not use them again. I was also someone in my room and wake me about bed. I did not even open my eyes because I'm sure it was just a nurse come to my blood pressure or temperature. I could feel that someone looks at me, so I opened my eyes. "What are you doing here ? " I asked surprised. " Ticker looked down and told me you were here," said Estrella. had a Preteen Nudist worried look on her face as she stared at me. "They came to see me? " We had a friendship and coma, but not n I think it was close enough to visit me in hospital. On the other hand, was not sure if I wanted another person as a ticker in my house. " No," he said. "I came to visit another person. When I saw online down, told me that the room we were in. So I thought I drop an and see how you are. " " I well, "he said casually. "I would leave here though. " " When can I leave?""If they think I 'm not going to hurt me again. " I looked up and saw a sad star in the face. " is true, then? " She asked. "It says in the news, which had tried commit suicide. " "Fuck," I groaned. "I was in the news? " Star suddenly nervous. "Maybe I should go. I do not think that that should tell you everything. Obviously I do not know. " "I do not know what, " I shouted angrily. "Being the biggest shit n'm in the city? I can not even die well. ". "I'd rather go to a sister. " Star running room and returned with a nurse. A minute later he was asleep again. The following days were emotional. I was interviewed by two psychologists. not be happy until I was an idiot babbling. What is them? You feel naked undress and then go to in a mirror at the ugly picture on the other side. Then there were the daily therapy sessions, which forced a sit- in was circle with others who had attempted suicide. that you know s what it means to sit for two hours in a container and refuse to talk? a for a while, it is a confrontation, which became the first break is. Dr. Conrad was convinced , which could induce me to shed the facade that had built around me, and sit on a lot of people, n I do not really give a shit on. N why on earth should have a room full of people saying my numb problems? " You will not get out of here, to talk to you," said online after the third day of my protest. " You gotta be kidding ?" I cried. " Bunch of fucking idiots. " N "You can condemn the fools," he said, "but they make the rules, , and must adhere to it. " N \\ \\ " you mean you have a fucking bunch of strangers say I was bothered by my ​​uncle and my life is fucked up ? " " When you leave, then yes, " he said. " Besides," he smiled Ticker. "I have some excellent herb. You 'll love it. " " Fucker", I laughed. "Must be a psychologist. " He paused finger tor lips and stared at the stroke of a joint. The two laughed at his antics. The next day I went to the therapy session and said that one of the stories recent shit I can do. I told them a bunch of guys n I was dragged into the woods when he was nine and raped her several times I n. Then they threatened me I was tortured for several years castrate me if I wanted to do what I did. I said, I've lived with the humiliation of my life, not to mention no. Finally, in desperation, I decided to kill me to end to the agony. When I finished, there was not a dry eye in the room. On the other hand, Dr. Conrad had to wipe away a tear or two. Of course, Dr. Conrad was involved, the names of children. However, I n le said he had spent several years and have never learned to their name. I said I never saw her again after she entered school. However, his behavior had left emotional scars that are difficult to lot wthat. They bought it hook, line and sinker. She was convinced that is the rape and subsequent attacks were the main factors in my n attempted suicide. " No! " Ticker was holding his stomach and laughs laughter. "Nine raped by a group of horny guys " started laughing again. " Well, it worked. " Grinned. "I leave this damn n held. Are you sure your father does not mind I 'll stay with you ? " " Will you stop worrying," he said. " I told you not care. Also, if I said I went to do homework to do, like very happy. " " help with homework ? " \\ \\ n " Well, actually, so for me. " ticker up and smiled. "No gives anything for free. " " Fucker" he said with a smile. " But you love me," he replied with a smile. "I'll be two. S The doctor said that would later be released. Dad with me. He has to sign a sheaf of papers he has. " N "I do not know yet how" I said anxiously. I knew, ticker, says it is , family had no objection, but I knew that a child is restless went to live with them. My attempt at suicide had been in the news, so I knew it, , would be something we should overcome all. After lunch, it made me very uncomfortable. It was a beautiful Saturday, and wanted to escape. If I could break for a while, I wanted to go Sullivan lake and spend some quiet time. doctors sedation could give me to eat all day but an hour in the lake were all the treatment he needed. I left my room and wandered. With the exception of participation in the therapy of sessions, I had never seen much in the hospital. The nurses looked n as I passed, but nobody made ​​an attempt to stop. When I walked down a long hallway, I saw stars up close. She smiled as they approached. " Are you the exception? " " Not yet," I replied. " This afternoon. I have hopefully Scores father there. " You took my hand. " Then come with me. " went to the elevator and hit her, button in the fourth floor. When is the closed door, stood back and looked at me puzzled. " Where do we go ? " N "I want you to meet a friend of mine", he shared it with me. "I come every day to visit him. " " Who's there? " " a friend," she said. The doors opened again and took the hand of my s and took me to an empty corridor. If we were to put 810, that s stopped. " If we leave now," he warned, "there is no need to panic. He does not like a visitors, so maybe I could a little irritated. " "Why is killing me ? " I asked. "I think you two look alike. " She looked at me with a feeling of the expectation. I do not know if this is something they had planned, or if was just spontaneous, when I was in the hallway. He was eager to start n be in " Come. " As if reading my thoughts, I took her hand and led me to in a dark room. As we approached the bed, I realized the character sleeps in the bed. He opened his eyes slowly. Immediately filled with rage. "What are you doing here ? " Preteen Nudist " Allen? " *************** E-mail comments to Ron ronyx Woh. rr. com Ronyx Visit the website: www. themustardjar. com for more stories.
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